Here's what I have discovered -
I started with nothing and I still have most of it.
My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran.
I finally got my head together and now my body is falling apart.
Funny, I don't remember being absent minded.
If all is not lost, then where is it?
It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
Some days you're the dog, some days you're the lamppost.
It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom.
If God wanted me to touch my toes he'd have put them on my knees.
I think a lot about the hereafter. I go upstairs and then wonder "What am I hereafter?”
God grant me the Senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones that I do and the eyesight to tell the difference.
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